| # | Speaker | Line |
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| 1 | Written by | Alexa Junge
Transcribed by: guineapig |
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| 31 | Joey | (to Ross) Hey! Here's the birthday boy! Ross, check it out: hockey tickets, Rangers-Penguins, tonight at the Garden, and we're taking you. |
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| 32 | Chandler | Happy birthday, pal! |
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| 33 | Joey | We love you, man. (Kisses Ross) |
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| 34 | Ross | Funny, my birthday was seven months ago. |
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| 35 | Joey | So? |
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| 36 | Ross | So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date? |
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| 37 | Chandler | Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty." |
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| 38 | Ross | Oh my God, oh- is today the twentieth, October twentieth? |
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| Nitpick: In the lines above, it's October 20th and Ross tells Joey and Chandler his birthday was "7 months ago" (putting his birthday in March), but in Episode 902: The One Where Emma Cries, line(s) 197-200, Ross says his birthday is October 18th. So Joey and Chandler's gift really WAS appropriate. In Episode 405: The One With Joey's New Girlfriend, line(s) 11-13, Ross starts to tell Gunther his birthday's in December. No wonder Joey doesn't know when Ross' birthday is -- it apparentally keeps changing! |
| Episode 902, Lines 197-200 |
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| 197 | Joey | It’s pretty, Okay date of birth? |
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| 198 | Ross | You know my birthday. |
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| 199 | Joey | Sure, May...tember. |
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| 200 | Ross | October 18th. |
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| Episode 405, Lines 11-13 |
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| 11 | Gunther | Oh, I-I'm just making a list of people's birthdays. |
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| 12 | Ross | Oh, mine's December... |
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| 13 | Gunther | Yeah, whatever. (Walks away) |
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| 39 | Monica | Oh, I was hoping you wouldn't remember. |
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| 40 | Ross | Ohhh. |
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| 41 | Joey | What's wrong with the twentieth? |
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| 42 | Chandler | Eleven days before Halloween.. all the good costumes are gone? |
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| 43 | Ross | Today's the day Carol and I first.. consummated our physical relationship. (Joey is puzzled.) Sex. ..You know what, I-I'd better pass on the game. I think I'm just gonna go home and think about my ex-wife and her lesbian lover. |
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| Not a nitpick: In Episode 105: The One With The East German Laundry Detergent, line(s) 183, Monica says she doesn't know when Ross lost his virginity. In the lines above, Monica knows when Ross first slept with Carol, who we later find out (Episode 104: The One With George Stephanopoulos, line(s) 217-221) was his first and only. However, Monica only knew when Ross first slept with Carol; she didn't realize Ross was a virgin prior to Carol, so this isn't an error. |
| Episode 105, Lines 183-183 |
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| 183 | Monica | Wow. My brother never even told me when he lost his virginity. |
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| Episode 104, Lines 217-221 |
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| 217 | Ross | My first time with Carol was... (He mumbles the last part) |
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| 218 | Joey | What? |
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| 219 | Ross | It was my first time. |
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| 220 | Joey | With Carol? (Ross gives him a look.) Oh. |
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| 221 | Chandler | So in your whole life, you've only been with one—(He gets a look too)—oh. |
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| 56 | Rachel | God, isn't this exciting? I earned this. I wiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totally—(opens envelope)—not worth it. Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money? I mean, what- Chandler, look at that. |
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| Observation: There's a McDonald's commercial with a line very similar to the lines above, but I don't know which came first. |
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| 170 | Monica | Do you have a plan? |
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| 171 | Phoebe | I don't even have a 'pl'. |
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| Observation: Phoebe has no life plan in the lines above, but does in Episode 309: The One With The Football, line(s) 80-81. (then again, 2 years is enough time to come up with a plan) |
| Episode 309, Lines 80-81 |
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| 80 | Monica | Phoebe, I thought you said you know what you’re doing? |
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| 81 | Phoebe | I thought you meant in life. |
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| 217 | Ross | My first time with Carol was... (He mumbles the last part) |
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| 218 | Joey | What? |
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| 219 | Ross | It was my first time. |
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| 220 | Joey | With Carol? (Ross gives him a look.) Oh. |
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| 221 | Chandler | So in your whole life, you've only been with one—(He gets a look too)—oh. |
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| Nitpick: In the lines above, Ross says he's only been with Carol, and Chandler doesn't correct him. But in Episode 704: The One With Rachel's Assistant, line(s) 218-219, Chandlers says Ross slept with the lady who cleaned their dorms. This isn't a nitpick for Ross, since, until Episode 704, he thought Chandler had slept w/ the dorm-cleaning lady. |
| Episode 704, Lines 218-219 |
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| 218 | Ross | Ohh! Ohh! In college, Chandler got drunk and slept with the lady who cleaned our dorm! |
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| 219 | Chandler | That was you! |
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| 224 | Monica | Okay. Okay, I got one. Do you remember that vegetarian pate that I made that you loved so much? |
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| 225 | Phoebe | Uh-huh. |
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| 226 | Monica | Well, unless goose is a vegetable...ha haaaah! |
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| Nitpick: In Episode 907: The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song, line(s) 173-175, meat makes Phoebe ill, but she's eaten meat before: Episode 416: The One With The Fake Party, line(s) 169-176, the lines above (unknowingly), and Episode 204: The One With Phoebe's Husband, line(s) 21-24. (maybe it's just veal?) |
| Episode 907, Lines 173-175 |
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| 173 | Phoebe | Oh no, no, no, no... That's okay, that's okay... I mean, I'm... I am a vegetarian... except for veal... Yeah no, veal I love... |
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| 174 | Mike | Phoebe you don't have to eat... |
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| 175 | Phoebe | No, no, no, I actually it's any baby animals: kittens, fish babies... You know... especially veal... and this, this nice vein of fat running through it... (she cuts the meat, picks it up with her fork and holds it in front of her mouth, which she keeps closed, trying to overcome her vegetarian thoughts... and... puts it in her mouth... Clearly not enjoying the meat....) Hmmm... yummy (everybody seems okay with it, except Mike. He's making a hmmmm.... face... Then Phoebe swallows it.) Hmmm... (at first she likes it, but then, in an instant puts her hand in front of her mouth and runs from the table. You hear a door slamming.) |
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| Episode 416, Lines 169-176 |
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| 169 | (ACTION) | He takes a bite out of the sandwich and as he does so, Phoebe attacks the other end and starts devouring the sandwich. |
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| 170 | Chandler | There’s a Phoebe on my sandwich! (He walks away, giving the sandwich to Phoebe.) |
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| 171 | Joey | Phoebe, what-what are you doing?! |
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| 172 | Phoebe | I can’t help it. I need the meat. The baby needs the meat. |
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| 173 | Joey | All right look, y’know how-y’know how when you’re dating someone and you don’t want to cheat on them, unless it’s with someone really hot? |
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| 174 | Phoebe | Yeah, totally! |
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| 175 | Joey | All right. Okay. Well this is the same kind of deal. If you’re going to do something wrong, (He grabs two steaks from the freezer) do it right! |
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| 176 | [SCENE] | Cut to later, Phoebe is finishing off her steak. |
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| Episode 204, Lines 21-24 |
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| 21 | Monica | Please, when he left town you stayed in your pajamas for a month and I saw you eat a cheeseburger. |
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| 22 | All | Huuh. |
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| 23 | Monica | Well, didn't you? |
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| 24 | Phoebe | I might have. |
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| 227 | Phoebe | Oh! Oh! Oh! Okay, fine, fine. Now I don't feel so bad about sleeping with Jason Hurley. |
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| 228 | Monica | What?! You slept with Jason? |
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| 229 | Phoebe | You'd already broken up. |
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| 230 | Rachel | How long? |
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| 231 | Phoebe | A couple hours. |
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| 232 | Monica | Oh, that's nice! |
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| Nitpick: In Episode 219: The One Where Eddie Won't Go, line(s) 199-200, Monica shouldn't be surprised Phoebe slept w/ Jason Hurley soon after Jason and Monica broke up -- Phoebe already told her this earlier (the lines above). |
| Episode 219, Lines 199-200 |
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| 199 | RACHEL | Well not when they find out you slept with Jason Hurley an hour after he broke up with Monica. |
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| 200 | MONICA | One hour? You are such a leaf blower. |
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| 236 | Monica | Really. Well, at least 'big girls' don't pee in their pants in seventh grade! |
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| 237 | Rachel | I was laughing! You made me laugh! (Monica and Rachel start to squabble) |
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| Observation: In Episode 117: The One With Two Parts: Part Two, line(s) 177, Monica reveals (sort of) that Rachel used to wet the bed. This is similar to the lines above, where Monica reveals Rachel peed in her pants, and to Episode 623: The One With The Ring, line(s) 74-76, where Rachel reveals she peed in her sleeping bag. |
| Episode 117, Lines 177-177 |
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| 177 | Monica | (as Rachel) I used to wet my bed. |
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| Episode 623, Lines 74-76 |
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| 74 | Rachel | Okay, well then how about puberty! Come on, that’s always a painful time! Y’know your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your hand in warm water while you’re sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag. |
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| 75 | Paul | Nope! That never happened to me! |
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| 76 | Rachel | Well, you’re lucky you never met that bitch Sharon Majesky. Anyway, umm… The rest of you life, y’know? Any regrets? |
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