| # | Speaker | Line |
| 1 | Written by | Betsy Bornes Transcribed by: Josh Hodge With Minor Adjustments by: Dan Silverstein
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| Nitpick: In Episode 107: The One With The Blackout, line(s) 118, Phoebe sings that she stays away from dairy, but the song obviously doesn't reflect her personal views. In Episode 103: The One With The Thumb, line(s) 290, she eats ice cream w/ everyone as they mope over Monica's breakup w/ Alan (below: Phoebe eating ice cream from Episode 103: The One With The Thumb). In Episode 112: The One With The Dozen Lasagnas, line(s) 207, we see she carries milk in a thermos (Rachel's probably too stunned to get some from the fridge), and in Episode 212: The One After the Superbowl, line(s) 491-492 and Episode 906: The One With The Male Nanny, line(s) 12, she puts milk in her coffee. In below: Phoebe pours herself some milk from this episode and below: Phoebe drinks the milk she poured from this episode, Phoebe pours herself some milk and drinks it. She also takes a swig of milk in Episode 507: The One Where Ross Moves In, line(s) 233, but this is mostly to protect Central Perk. I also don't count Episode 202: The One With The Breast Milk, line(s) 102, because human breast milk doesn't really qualify as dairy. |
| Episode 107, Lines 118-118 |
| 118 | Phoebe | (singing) New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. But to me it is not scary, 'cause I stay away from dairy.... la la la, la la, la la... (she writes the lyrics down) |
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| Episode 103, Lines 290-290 |
| 290 | [SCENE] | Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is mopping around and eating ice cream. |
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| Episode 112, Lines 207-207 |
| 207 | Phoebe | Ok, I've got milk (takes thermos from her bag and starts to pour a cup) Here you go... (Rachel drinks straight from thermos) Oh!(Rachel finishes thermos) Better? |
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| Episode 212, Lines 491-492 |
| 491 | CHANDLER | Hey Phoebs, can I have the milk after you? |
| 492 | PHOEBE | I'm almost done with it, keep your panties on. |
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| Episode 906, Lines 12-12 |
| 12 | Scene | Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike are on the couch, holding hands, while Phoebe puts milk in her coffee. |
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| Episode 507, Lines 233-233 |
| 233 | Phoebe | Oh, no-no, this place is totally healthy! Thatthis milk is mine. I bought this today, 'cause I was thirsty for milk, y'know. (She takes a swig of it, but has to turn away from him as she makes a face to show that it has gone bad.) Okay, let's go! |
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| Episode 202, Lines 102-102 |
| 102 | Phoebe | Duh, I think I know how to heat breast milk. Ok. (Squirts some on her wrist and tastes it.) |
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| Image below: Phoebe eating ice cream |
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| Image below: Phoebe pours herself some milk |
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| Image below: Phoebe drinks the milk she poured |
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| 67 | [Scene | Joey's co-star's apartment. Chandler and Joey are at the brunch.] |
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| 68 | JOEY | Can you believe this place? |
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| 69 | CHANDLER | I know, this is a great apartment. |
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| 70 | JOEY | Ah, I was just in the bathroom, and there's mirrors on both sides of you. So when you're in there it's like you're peein' with the Rockettes. |
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| Nitpick: In the lines above, Joey notes his new bathroom has mirrors on both sides of the toilet, and in Episode 218: The One Where Dr. Remoray Dies, line(s) 248-249, Monica says she straightened out Joey's shower curtain. However, below: Joey's bathroom from Episode 217: The One Where Eddie Moves In shows that Joey's bathroom has a translucent shower door, not mirrors or a shower curtain. |
| Episode 218, Lines 248-249 |
| 248 | PHOEBE | Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say. |
| 249 | MONICA | Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice. |
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| Image below: Joey's bathroom |
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| 104 | PHOEBE | I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922? |
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| 105 | RACHEL | What's 1922? |
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| 106 | PHOEBE | Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - a lot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do you want to get this tattoo? |
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| Observation: the lines above seems to indicate Phoebe thinks that women's sufferage (the right to vote) came after 1922. In the United States, at least, this happened in 1920. Of course, Phoebe's probably not a history buff. |
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| 203 | [Scene | Tattoo parlor. Rachel is showing Phoebe her tattoo.] |
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| 204 | PHOEBE | Oh that looks so good, oh I love it. |
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| 205 | RACHEL | I know, so do I. Oh Phoebe, I'm so glad you made me do this. OK, lemme se yours. |
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| 206 | PHOEBE | Ahh. OK, let's see yours again. |
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| 207 | RACHEL | Phoebe we just saw mine, let me see yours. |
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| 208 | PHOEBE | Oh OK. [pulls over her shirt and shows a bare shoulder] Oh no, oh it's gone, that's so weird, I don't know how-where it went. |
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| 209 | RACHEL | You didn't get it? |
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| 210 | PHOEBE | No. |
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| 211 | RACHEL | Why didn't you get it? |
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| 212 | PHOEBE | I'm sorry, I'm sorry. |
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| 213 | RACHEL | Phoebe, how would you do this to me? This was all your idea. |
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| 214 | PHOEBE | I know, I know, and I was gonna get it but then he came in with this needle and uh, di-, did you know they do this with needles? |
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| 215 | RACHEL | Really? You don't say, because mine was licked on by kittens. |
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| Nitpick: Episode 714: The One Where They All Turn Thirty, line(s) 62-64 seem to indicate Rachel has a low tolerance for pain. But in the lines above, she got a tattoo, which is similarly painful. |
| Episode 714, Lines 62-64 |
| 62 | Rachel | Yknow what? I am going to do something today. Im not just gonna sit around like some old lady. Im gonna get something pierced. Like my uh, like my nose or my tongue or something. |
| 63 | Phoebe | Really?! Cause yknow that hurts. |
| 64 | Rachel | So what?! Yknow what? The way I see it(Phoebe pulls out a hair from the back of her head)Ow! Son of a bitch!! |
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| 261 | RACHEL | That is not a tattoo, that is a nothing. I finally got her back in the chair, bairly touched her with a needle, she jumped up screaming, and that was it. |
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| Observation: In Episode 714: The One Where They All Turn Thirty, line(s) 62-64, it's ironic that Phoebe tells Rachel piercings are painful. In the lines above, it was Phoebe who chickened out of getting a tattoo because it was too painful. |
| Episode 714, Lines 62-64 |
| 62 | Rachel | Yknow what? I am going to do something today. Im not just gonna sit around like some old lady. Im gonna get something pierced. Like my uh, like my nose or my tongue or something. |
| 63 | Phoebe | Really?! Cause yknow that hurts. |
| 64 | Rachel | So what?! Yknow what? The way I see it(Phoebe pulls out a hair from the back of her head)Ow! Son of a bitch!! |
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