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Episode 306: The One With The Flashback

Only annotated lines are quoted below, not the entire script

#SpeakerLine
1Written byMarta Kauffman & David Crane
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
4JaniceJanice has a question. Who of the six of you has sleep with the six of you?
5PhoebeWow, it’s like a dirty math problem.
6RossI’m sorry the answer there would be...none of us.
Nitpick: Ross says none of the Friends slept with each other (Episode E306/L4-6: , line(s) 306), but he's sleeping with Rachel at the time. (the DVD version's joke about this got cut (for time?), so the creators are aware of this "inconsistency").
 
52[SCENE]Scene: Chandler’s, Chandler is interviewing Joey.
53Chandler(running around the apartment pointing out things) Bedroom. Bathroom. Living room. This right here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by, (opens door) Bye-bye.
54JoeyDon’t you ah, don’t you wanna ask me any questions?
55ChandlerSure. Ummm. What’s up?
56JoeyWell, ah, I’m an actor. I’m fairly neat. I ah, I got my own TV. Oh, and don’t worry I’m totally okay with the gay thing.
57ChandlerWhat gay thing?
58JoeyAh, y'know just in general people being gay, thing. I’m totally cool with that.
Nitpick: Joey says he didn't think Chandler was gay when they first met (Episode E108/L17-20: , line(s) 108), but Episode E306/L52-58: , line(s) 306 shows otherwise.
Episode 108, Lines 17-20
17ChandlerHuh. Did, uh... any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?
18MonicaI did.
19PhoebeYeah, I think so, yeah.
20JoeyNot me.
 
83Rachel(sitting at a table with some of her friends) (to waitress) Oh, um, no, no, no, no excuse me, hello. Hi. My friend ordered an onion, not an olive, and uh I ordered a rum and Diet Coke, which I don’t think this is.
84WaitressI am so sorry.
85RachelThat’s all right. (to her friends) I mean hard is it to get a couple drinks right, huh?
Nitpick: Rachel sends back a drink (Episode E306/L83-85: , line(s) 306), but later (Episode E105/L148-150: , line(s) 105) says she can't even send back soup. (Episode 306 is a flashback, and occurs before Episode 105)
Episode 105, Lines 148-150
148Ross(to the crowd in the laundromat) All right, show's over. Nothing to see here. (to Rachel) Ok, let's do laundry.
149RachelThat was amazing. I can't even send back soup.
150RossWell, that's because you're such a sweet, gentle, uh...Do you, uh, do you...Oh, hey, uh you must need detergent.
 
94RachelI’m serious, I really, I think I need just to have some...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
95(ACTION)Chandler throws the cue ball under there table.
96ChandlerExcuse, I seem to have dropped my ball.
97RachelYeah, so?
98Chandler(picks it up) And now I’ve picked it up again. (walks over to Monica.)
99MonicaOh my God, I went to high school with her. (to Rachel) Rachel! Hi!
Nitpick: Rachel/Chandler meet at the Geller's Thanksgiving dinner, 1987 (Episode E508/L118: , line(s) 508), make out days later (Episode E1011/L277-282: , line(s) 1011), but don't recognize each other in either Episode E306/L94-99: , line(s) 306 nor Episode E101/L53: , line(s) 101. To compensate: Rachel remembers Chandler in Episode E615/L102-108: , line(s) 615 (the "fake" episode); in Episode E706/L180: , line(s) 706, Rachel "became friends with" (not "met") Chandler when he was 25, implying they met earlier. (this is probably the most twisted bit of continuity in the entire series)
Episode 508, Lines 118-118
118RossUh, everyone, this is Chandler! My roommate and lead singer of our band!
Episode 1011, Lines 277-282
277ChandlerWell, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.
278Rachel(blushing) Oh, what a line. (walks towards the drinks table with her back towards Chandler and whispers "Oh my God!")
279ChandlerSo where are you applying to?
280RachelOh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!
281ChandlerI'm in college and I'm in a band.
282Rachel(She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)
Episode 101, Lines 53-53
53Monica(pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Episode 615, Lines 102-108
102RossMon, look who I ran into! (Gestures towards Rachel.)
103Monica(gets up and gasps) Oh my God! Rachel!! (Rachel is stunned to see that her long lost friend is still fat.) (Monica goes over and gives Rachel a big bear hug, which is quite easy for her.) You look terrific!
104RachelOhh, so do you! Did you lose weight? (She’s not quite sure of that one.)
105MonicaYou are so sweet to notice! Yes, I lost three and a half pounds!
106RossAnd, and uh, you-you remember my friend Chandler. (Points to him.)
107ChandlerHey.
108RachelOh yeah.
Episode 706, Lines 180-180
180RachelOkay! Okay! Umm, Webster’s Dictionary defines marriage as… (Ross and Joey start writing.) Okay!! Forget that! That sucks!! Okay, never mind! Forget it! Umm, umm, okay, uh… I met, I-I met, I met Monica when we were just a couple of six-year-olds and I became friends with Chandler when he was 25, although he seemed like a six-year-old.
 
159MonicaThis place is really my Grandmother’s. (Joey starts to take off all of his clothes, while Monica gets the glasses and pours the lemonade.) I got it from her when she moved to Florida, otherwise I could never afford a place like this. So if the landlord ever asks, I’m 87 year old woman, who’s afraid of her VCR. So are you thirsty?
Observation: Joey knows Monica's subletting illegally (Episode E306/L159: , line(s) 306), so why does he confront Treger in Episode E404/L49-54: , line(s) 404? (given what Joey was doing in Episode 306, he might not've been paying attention, or perhaps he thought Treger wouldn't bring this up?).
Episode 404, Lines 49-54
49JoeyHey! You hold on pal! Now you made my friend, Rachel, cry. So now, you’re gonna go up there and apologize to her, unless you want me to call the landlord.
50Mr. Treeger: And tell him what?
51JoeyHave you heard about a little something called, Not Making Girls Cry.
52Mr. Treeger: Yeah. Well maybe you have heard about the Rent Stabilization Act of 1968!
53JoeyI have actually not heard of that.
54Mr. Treeger: Yeah, well your friends are in violation of it. I’ve been a nice guy up until now, but uh, I don’t need this grief. I’m gonna call the landlord and tell him that Monica is illegally subletting here grandmother’s apartment. Your friends are outta here pal.
 
161Monica(turning around) Okay, here’s your penis!
Observation: (from The creators of Friends (via website/DVD commentary/etc)) The creators weren't allowed to use the word "penis" for quite some time during the middle of the series. The word isn't used at all for the 4.5 years between Episode E306/L161: , line(s) 306 and Episode E721/L272: , line(s) 721 (or Episode E723/L140: , line(s) 723, excluding flashbacks), but is used occasionally before Episode 306 and after Episode 721.
Episode 721, Lines 272-272
272RossYes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
Episode 723, Lines 140-140
140Mrs. BingDon’t you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?
 
214MonicaI don’t understand, I mean am I so hard to live, is this why I don’t have a boyfriend?
215ChandlerNoo!! You don’t have a boyfriend because....I don’t, I don’t know why you don’t have a boyfriend. You should have a boyfriend.
216MonicaWell, I think so.
217ChandlerOh-ho, come here. (goes and hugs her) Listen, you are one of my favourite people and the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known in real life.
218[SCENE]Scene: the bar, Ross is entering, Phoebe is at the bar, they are the only two in the place.
Observation: Episode E123/L90: , line(s) 123 is the first time Chandler's romantically interested in Monica. Chloe Rogers notes that Chandler also shows a romantic interest in Monica in Episode E306/L214-218: , line(s) 306, and a sexual interest in her in Episode E508/L202-208: , line(s) 508, both flashbacks which occur later in the series, but earlier in the Friends timeline.
Episode 123, Lines 90-90
90ChandlerAll right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Episode 508, Lines 202-208
202(ACTION)Monica enters, but she forgot something. Oh, about 150 pounds. In other words, she lost weight, big time!
203MonicaHi, Chandler.
204ChandlerOh my God!
205MonicaWhat-what's the matter? Is there, is there something on my dress? (She turns around making sure he gets a good look.)
206ChandlerYou just, you look so different! Terrific! That dress! That body!
207RossDude!
208ChandlerSorry!
 
244PhoebeAnd you’re so sweet. (kisses him on the other cheek) And you’re kind (kisses him on the lips)
245RossThanks. (kisses her on the lips)
246(ACTION)They pause, and they the start kissing passionately, and taking off each others clothes, and they start to lie down on the pool table.
Observation: In the flashback episode (Episode E306/L244-246: , line(s) 306), Ross and Phoebe nearly have sex on a pool table. In Episode E107/L56-58: , line(s) 107, Ross seems surprised his sister would do the same thing.
Episode 107, Lines 56-58
56MonicaOK, I'll go. OK, senior year of college... on a pool table.
57AllWhoooaa!
58RossThat's my sister.
Nitpick: In Episode E902/L94: , line(s) 902, Phoebe says no good can come from having sex w/ Ross, but in Episode E306/L244-246: , line(s) 306, she almost does this herself.
Episode 902, Lines 94-94
94PhoebeYeah, no kidding, this just proves no good can come from having sex with Ross!
 
267MonicaHey, are you okay?
268RossMy wife’s a lesbian.
269JoeyCool!!
Observation: Episode E923/L270-274: , line(s) 923 and Episode E916/L190: , line(s) 916 explains how Carol got pregnant (Episode E102/L35-36: , line(s) 102) a year after becoming a lesbian (Episode E306/L268-269: , line(s) 306). (flashback episode 306 occurs over a year before Episode 102)
Episode 923, Lines 270-274
270RossMy wife had a workout friend she went to the gym with everyday for a year. She didn't get any fitter.
271CharlieRight and then everybody finds out and they're like: "Oh, I knew all along"
272RossI know! It's like, if you knew, why didn't you tell me, you know? I mean, call, or leave a note: "Hi, I just dropped by to say your wife's gay"
273CharlieI know!
274RossAnd then, you try to make the best of a bad situation, so you float the idea of a threesome?
Episode 916, Lines 190-190
190RossIf you have to call me name, I prefer Ross the Divorcer. It's just cooler. Look...I know my marriages haven't exactly worked out. But I love to be that committed to another person. And Caroline and I had some good times before she became a lesbian! And once afterward. I'm sorry.
Episode 102, Lines 35-36
35CarolI'm pregnant.
36RossPregnant?!
 
270ChandlerRoss-Joey, Joey-Ross. (they shake hands)
Nitpick: In Episode E113/L58: , line(s) 113, Joey's dad seems surprised things are wrong between Ross and his wife. However, when Joey first meets Ross in Episode E306/L267-270: , line(s) 306, Ross is depressed that his wife's a lesbian. In other words, Ross' marriage hasn't been going well the entire time Joey has known Ross!
Episode 113, Lines 58-58
58Mr. TribbianiOh, 'scuse me. So Ross, uh, how's the wife? (Ross whines and lays his head on Chandler's shoulder) Off there too, uh? Uh, Chandler, quick, say something funny!
 
Original scripts courtesy:
The Complete Friends Script Index (CFSI)
which is maintained by Eric Aasen, originally created by gunieapig (this site is currently down).
DISCLAIMER: This site is not affiliated with Warner Brothers, NBC, Bright, Kaufmann, Crane, or any entity involved in producing, distributing, broadcasting, or otherwise related to the television show Friends. The name of this site is intended purely as a tribute; no affiliation to any actor or character is implied or should be inferred. This site is also not affiliated with The Complete Friends Script Index (CFSI) site. Script portions appearing here are not the actual scripts as written, only as transcribed by others. Only the portions of scripts required for annotations are quoted. Script portions, images, audio, video, and other material from the show Friends is reproduced without explicit permission from Warner Brothers, but this reproduction falls under the "fair use" provision of copyright law. The purpose of this site is for education and entertainment. No profit is derived from this site. There is no guarantee of accuracy. Use at your own risk. Some material on this site may not be suitable for children.
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