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Episode 101: The Pilot

Only annotated lines are quoted below, not the entire script

#SpeakerLine
1Written byMarta Kauffman & David Crane
Transcribed by: guineapig
Additional transcribing by: Eric Aasen
(Note: The previously unseen parts of this episode are shown in blue text.)
Nitpick: In Episode 215: The One Where Ross and Rachel...You Know, line(s) 70, Chandler confirms that Chandler/Joey and Rachel/Monica live in apartments 19 and 20 (also below: Chandler and Joey apartment number is 19 from Episode 108: The One Where Nana Dies Twice and below: Monica and Rachel apartment number is 20 from Episode 108: The One Where Nana Dies Twice). In below: Monica and Rachel in apartment 5 from this episode and below: Joey and Chandler in apartment 4 from this episode, they live in apartments 4 and 5.
Episode 215, Lines 70-70
70CHANDLERUh, two larges, extra cheese on both. But listen, don't ring the buzzer for 19, ring 20, Geller-Green, they'll let you in, OK. If you buzz our door, there's no tip for you. OK, thanks. Pizza's on the way. I told you we wouldn't have to get up.
Image below: Chandler and Joey apartment number is 19
Image below: Monica and Rachel apartment number is 20
Image below: Monica and Rachel in apartment 5
Image below: Joey and Chandler in apartment 4
 
53Monica(pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Nitpick: Rachel/Chandler meet at the Geller's Thanksgiving dinner, 1987 (Episode 508: The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks, line(s) 118), make out days later (Episode 1011: The One Where The Stripper Cries, line(s) 277-282), but don't recognize each other in either Episode 306: The One With The Flashback, line(s) 94-99 nor the lines above. To compensate: Rachel remembers Chandler in Episode 615: The One That Could Have Been, line(s) 102-108 (the "fake" episode); in Episode 706: The One With The Nap Partners, line(s) 180, Rachel "became friends with" (not "met") Chandler when he was 25, implying they met earlier. (this is probably the most twisted bit of continuity in the entire series)
Episode 508, Lines 118-118
118RossUh, everyone, this is Chandler! My roommate and lead singer of our band!
Episode 1011, Lines 277-282
277ChandlerWell, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.
278Rachel(blushing) Oh, what a line. (walks towards the drinks table with her back towards Chandler and whispers "Oh my God!")
279ChandlerSo where are you applying to?
280RachelOh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of... (Chandler leans in an kisses her) (She pulls away) Hey!
281ChandlerI'm in college and I'm in a band.
282Rachel(She considers it for a second) Yeah okay. (She puts her hands around his neck and they start kissing again)
Episode 306, Lines 94-99
94RachelI’m serious, I really, I think I need just to have some...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
95(ACTION)Chandler throws the cue ball under there table.
96ChandlerExcuse, I seem to have dropped my ball.
97RachelYeah, so?
98Chandler(picks it up) And now I’ve picked it up again. (walks over to Monica.)
99MonicaOh my God, I went to high school with her. (to Rachel) Rachel! Hi!
Episode 615, Lines 102-108
102RossMon, look who I ran into! (Gestures towards Rachel.)
103Monica(gets up and gasps) Oh my God! Rachel!! (Rachel is stunned to see that her long lost friend is still fat.) (Monica goes over and gives Rachel a big bear hug, which is quite easy for her.) You look terrific!
104RachelOhh, so do you! Did you lose weight? (She’s not quite sure of that one.)
105MonicaYou are so sweet to notice! Yes, I lost three and a half pounds!
106RossAnd, and uh, you-you remember my friend Chandler. (Points to him.)
107ChandlerHey.
108RachelOh yeah.
Episode 706, Lines 180-180
180RachelOkay! Okay! Umm, Webster’s Dictionary defines marriage as… (Ross and Joey start writing.) Okay!! Forget that! That sucks!! Okay, never mind! Forget it! Umm, umm, okay, uh… I met, I-I met, I met Monica when we were just a couple of six-year-olds and I became friends with Chandler when he was 25, although he seemed like a six-year-old.
 
156RachelBarry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me.  And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
Nitpick: In Episode 102: The One With The Sonogram At the End, line(s) 187, Rachel's ex-fiancee is referred to as Dr. Farber, but as Dr. Finkel in the lines above
Episode 102, Lines 187-187
187Bernice(over intercom) Dr. Farber, Jason Greenstein's gagging.
 
185Ross(scornful) Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you?
Observation: Thanks to Darcy Partridge for enlightening me: "Billy, Don't Be A Hero" in the lines above refers to a 1974 song by Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods. So, Ross is presumably joking he hasn't "grabbed a spoon" since 1974 (he's of course exaggerating, since he'd be only about 4 years old then)
 
289AllCut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut..
290Chandler(as Rachel is cutting up her cards) Y'know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream.
291(ACTION)She finishes cutting them up and they all cheer.
Observation: Rachel cuts up her credit cards in the lines above, but still has a huge VISA bill in Episode 118: The One With All The Poker, line(s) 23-25. (maybe it's just existing revolving debt and/or Rachel got new credit cards in her own name since then)
Episode 118, Lines 23-25
23RachelWhat?
24Phoebe(reading): Your Visa bill is huge!
25Rachel(grabs the bill) Give me that!
 
Original scripts courtesy:
The Complete Friends Script Index (CFSI)
which is maintained by Eric Aasen, originally created by gunieapig (this site is currently down).
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