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Episode 303: The One With All The Jam

Only annotated lines are quoted below, not the entire script

#SpeakerLine
1Written byWil Calhoun
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
26Phoebe(turns around) Um, that's it. No. Hey! You! J. Crew guy. Yeah. Why have you been following me? I mean, all week long everywhere I look there's you.
27GuyYou wouldn't return my calls, you sent back my letters....
Observation: Phoebe/Ursula's stalker (the lines above) is played by David Arquette, who later married Courtney Cox.
 
165MonicaOkay, all right, how's this? 27. Italian-American guy. He's an actor, born in Queens. Wow, big family, seven sisters, and he's the only....boy. (they all turn and look at Joey) Oh my God, under personal comments: 'New York Knicks, rule!'
166JoeyYeah, the Knicks rule!
167MonicaJoey, this is you!
168JoeyLet me see. (goes over and looks at the form) Oh, right.
Nitpick: In Episode 111: The One With Mrs. Bing, line(s) 153-155, Joey says his mom gave birth to 7 children, which would mean him and 6 siblings. In Episode 206: The One With The Baby On the Bus, line(s) 40-43, Joey says he has 7 sisters, and the lines above confirms this. We know the names of 6 of Joey's sisters: Gina, Dina (both Episode 311: The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister, line(s) 154-159), Mary Angela, Mary Theresa (both Episode 311: The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister, line(s) 264-266), Cookie (Episode 311: The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister, line(s) 289-291), and Tina (Episode 113: The One With The Boobies, line(s) 250). The scene in Episode 903: The One With The Pediatrician, line(s) 182-184 may be a reference to this inconsistency.
Episode 111, Lines 153-155
153JoeyYou don't think my mom's sexy?
154RossWell... not in the same way...
155JoeyI'll have you know that Gloria Tribbiani was a handsome woman in her day, alright? You think it's easy giving birth to seven children?
Episode 206, Lines 40-43
40RossWhat about Ben? We can't bring a baby to a hospital.
41JoeyWe'll watch him.
42RossI don't think tho.
43JoeyWhat? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on, we wanna do it, don't we?
Episode 311, Lines 154-159
154PhoebeHow can you not know which one?
155RachelI mean that’s unbelievable.
156MonicaI mean, was it Gina?
157RossWhich one is Gina?
158RachelDark, big hair, with the airplane earrings.
159MonicaNo, no, no, that’s Dina.
Episode 311, Lines 264-266
264Joey’s SisterSo! Me neither! God, Mary-Angela was right you do have the softest lips.
265ChandlerAhhhh, you’re not Mary-Angela.
266Joey’s SisterNo, I’m Mary-Theresa.
Episode 311, Lines 289-291
289ChandlerYou’ve got it. (he starts to look at his sister’s, but he still doesn’t know which one is Mary-Angela.)
290JoeyCookie, now you can punch him!
291ChandlerWhat?! (Cookie punches him)
Episode 113, Lines 250-250
250JoeyYeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.
Episode 903, Lines 182-184
182PhoebeMike, let me ask you something. How many sisters does Joey have?
183Mike(Joey holds up six fingers) Six!
184JoeyWhat are you doing? I said seven! (Holds up six fingers.) (Realizes his mistake) Argh!!!
 
Original scripts courtesy:
The Complete Friends Script Index (CFSI)
which is maintained by Eric Aasen, originally created by gunieapig (this site is currently down).
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